Can't Articulate Your Thoughts in Some Situations But Not Others? Here's Why (And What to Do About It)
If you struggle to articulate your thoughts only sometimes, it may seem unpredictable and random.
But it's anything but.
I recently started working with a client who runs engineering teams in both the US and his home country. He's a cofounder of a tech company and a scientist at heart.
He told me something I hear constantly from leaders who experience unpredictable speaking anxiety:
"I'm completely comfortable speaking to my teams back home on Zoom in my native language. But here in the US, in English, in person? I can't articulate my thoughts."
He could talk about the science with zero hesitation. But the moment questions shifted to business or leadership, he had trouble finding words to articulate his ideas.
Why You Can't Articulate Thoughts in Some Situations
In his home language, he was clear, direct, succinct. He didn't worry about offending anyone.
The moment he switched to English, he was carefully choosing every word. Worrying about hurting feelings. His attention split between what he wanted to say and how he thought he was being perceived.
This splintered attention is incredibly common.
I see it constantly with:
Leaders managing multiple languages and cultures at work
People with deep technical expertise moving into leadership roles
Anyone who feels underrepresented or unsafe in certain workplace environments
Professionals who are confident in their expertise but struggle to articulate it to authority figures
The Real Reason Your Mind Goes Blank When Speaking
I asked this client to observe his thought patterns when he was comfortable versus when he was uncomfortable.
When comfortable (speaking his native language, talking about science): His focus was entirely on what he wanted to say.
When challenged (speaking English about leadership): His attention fractured. He started over-indexing facial expressions. Reading every micro-reaction. Trying to make everyone feel heard.
He believed that because he wasn't from here, he was at a disadvantage. That he didn't inherently understand the culture. That he had to work harder to communicate.
But working harder was perpetuating the problem.
He'd been told that he had to "read the room" and make people feel heard as a leader. This is true. But this advice can debilitate empathetic leaders who care deeply about how others feel.
In our session, we realized he was over-indexing facial expressions when speaking in English with his team. He wanted his team to feel included and heard, but this over-indexing was throwing him off center.
How to Articulate Your Thoughts When Your Mind Goes Blank
I put him on the spot to practice thinking on his feet. We found a tool to help anchor his attention in the present moment (instead of worrying about the before and after).
He said it was a game changer.
He could finally access the same focus and confidence in English that came naturally when speaking in his home language.
Step 1: Notice Your Physicality When Comfortable
I told him to pay attention to his body language when he felt comfortable speaking.
He noticed that he didn't have to think about his communication at all when he was confident:
Leaning back
Breathing naturally
Quite relaxed
But the moment he switched to less comfortable interactions:
He would lean in and tense up
Speak quickly
His eyes moved rapidly
Step 2: Use Conscious Micro-Pausing
Instead of starting to speak right away, we practiced conscious micro-pausing.
Through this practice, he realized he was not giving himself time to think on his feet at all. Instead of speaking and thinking at the same time, we worked to front-load his thinking through deliberate tiny pauses, where he could actually plan out what he wanted to say.
This changed everything.
Immediately he could access the same innate confidence that came easily in his most comfortable moments.
Why This Approach Works for Speaking Anxiety
This is what I mean when I say this work is about focus, not communication.
You already know how to communicate. You do it perfectly when you're comfortable.
What you need is a way to consolidate your attention when it wants to split.
Your body knows the difference between:
Centered and scattered
Grounded and anxious
Focused and fragmented
How to Stop Your Mind From Going Blank
If you struggle to articulate your thoughts only sometimes, pay attention to your body language when you're comfortable speaking.
Notice everything:
Your posture
Your breath
Where your eyes rest
How fast you talk
Then recreate that physicality in moments when you feel unsafe or unheard.
Practical shifts:
Lean back instead of forward
Breathe into the belly instead of holding your breath
Pause before speaking instead of rushing
Let your eyes rest on something stable instead of scanning faces
You can muscle-memory your way back to your center.
Why You Have Trouble Finding Words (It's Not What You Think)
If you can articulate your thoughts perfectly in some situations but struggle in others, the issue isn't your communication skills or vocabulary.
It's that your attention is splitting.
Between what you want to say and how you think you're being perceived.
Between your expertise and your fear of not being understood.
Between your natural communication style and what you think is expected of you.
When your attention consolidates—when you're fully present in your body, grounded in the moment—your ability to articulate returns.
The words were always there. Your focus just needed anchoring.
